lost in my own thoughts

so I've been a bit torn lately...I was thinking.....overanalyzing really..the relationships that I have in my life. All my life I've had a handful of friends. I've literally been hanging out with the same people since like 4th grade. I love my friends....but lately I don't really LIKE them. I don't have a problem with ALL of them just certain ones.  I've had people walk in and out of my life just as much as the next guy, but why is it so hard for me to walk away from things/people that I'm having a real issue with? I've just been feeling lately like I have nothing in common with these people anymore. How did we become so different and where do you take it from there? What happens when you wake up one day and realize that you don't enjoy the person that your friend, or partner or who ever has become. Do you cut them off? Would you really have a relationship with this person if you hadn't known them all your life? We've changed, but we just keep hanging on...why??

Am I this person that doesn't have the courage to walk away...so I wait to be walked away from?

Maybe I'm just bored...in need of a fresh start..of fresh faces....which I was surrounded by in Nursing School but I haven't really opened up to these new people...my insecurities have built up this wall that just keeps me from going out and fully engaging with these new people. It's like Im stuck in this world of the same things over and over again....its what I'm used to......but all of a sudden its become uncomfortable....and I just don't know what to do.  ugh.

Dee

Shiraz and some Me Time...

Hey blog. So its been a couple of weeks and it has been great being off from school. I feel like I have so much time now. Just trying to decide what exactly to fill my time with. I've been working full time no which after a year of not doing so..really sucks ass. But the money is good so Thank God for that. I've been reading, and drinking wine(drinking some Shiraz right now btw) and taking lil trips to the city..and planning for a great summer. Oh... I got a tattoo.

and I love it.

so for those of you who hate tattoos I'm sorry or I'm not.lol....It's been quiet......I've had a lot of me time...and a lot of  fun.. Memorial weekend was great...mmm with a few blah moments. but I guess its just the beginning. Next year by now I will be graduating, hopefully. It's been a great couple of weeks..sooo looking forward to the rest.